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+---- Thread: # | The Consciousness - The Darkness Within (/showthread.php?tid=4216466)
# | The Consciousness - The Darkness Within - Αnonymous - May 7, 2014
These are thoughts - our thoughts.
Whether or not you believe it to be true is of no relevance to us.
If you feel nothing from reading the title; if the meaning of the title is unknown to you, then we suggest you disregard this thread and go on with your daily activities..
However if you understand what we mean; if you feel as we feel; if you've been seeking as we've been seeking, then I ask you to read this thread in its entirety, and we'll then walk through the valley of the shadow of death, while fearing no evil, because we'll both know that nothing could possibly be worse than the darkness within us.
Exactly two weeks ago, we posted a thread titled 'The Story'.
We've waited patiently until that thread received 666 replies, to release the next part of the story that is '#'.
Whether or not you believe it to be true is of no relevance to us.
If you feel nothing from reading the title; if the meaning of the title is unknown to you, then we suggest you disregard this thread and go on with your daily activities..
However if you understand what we mean; if you feel as we feel; if you've been seeking as we've been seeking, then I ask you to read this thread in its entirety, and we'll then walk through the valley of the shadow of death, while fearing no evil, because we'll both know that nothing could possibly be worse than the darkness within us.
Exactly two weeks ago, we posted a thread titled 'The Story'.
We've waited patiently until that thread received 666 replies, to release the next part of the story that is '#'.
Being Different
"You don't need to work for anything!" ------ "You've received so much money."
"You don't realise how lucky you are, I swear"
There's several faces behind the mask that is '#'.. - Skids
"You don't realise how lucky you are, I swear"
There's several faces behind the mask that is '#'.. - Skids
My success - and that of # - has got absolutely nothing to do with luck; I've sacrificed many things in order toget to where I am today, and even though I wouldn't change anything, it saddens me to know that I won't ever experience the life of a normal person.
All of this didn't just magically happen, but is a result of hard work and dedication, but more importantly, it's only possibly because of specific traits in my persona.
I've heard personal and emotional stories from numerous members on here, and it's clear to me that none of us are alone with our struggles. This thread is dedicated to some specific people I've been talking to over the course of the last month; I'm not going to point out people - you know who you are when you're reading this.
Why Did You Join?
Take a second and ask yourself why you joined these forums..
Did you come to get free games and other bullshit? Did you want a stresser to be l33t h4x0r and DDoS people on xbox? Did you come to learn how to spy on your cheating whore of a girlfriend?
If either of these are true, then we're in no way alike and you could never even start to understand the inner struggles myself and countless other members are having each and every day..
We're cursed.
Are you a kid who never goes into the darkness of your basement? Who can't sleep after watching a horror movie? Who rush to the security of your blanket when you turn the lights off?
Consider yourself lucky, because the rest of us stopped checking for monsters under our beds when we realized they were inside of us..
Are We Alike?
I don't mean to be mean, but that's all I can be when these skids seek me out, while trying to act tough even though they're ten years old with a near perfect childhood.
No, I don't know them, but I know I don't owe them a thing and if they offend me, I can guarantee that I'll be a prick. I don't care who's there or who'll see me destroy them; give me even the slightest reason to fuck with them and I'll take it.
I quite simply don't give a fuck..
There's an idea of me, but there is no real 'me': only an entity, something illusory. Even though I can hide my cold gaze, and people can shake my hand and feel my warm flesh gripping theirs, and maybe they can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable.. I simply am not there.
Now to the most important question of this thread; can you relate?
I'm Not Crazy
From reading what I've already written, you must think I'm a complete sociopath, but the truth is that we're only just getting started..
I don't feel empathy nor do I feel sorry for people. To be honest I rarely have any positive feelings when it comes to strangers..
On the contrary, I have this urge to control and manipulate people solely to drag them around in the dirt for my own pleasure, just to prove that they're below me.
My urge is constant and sharp, and I do not hope for a better world for anyone; in fact, I want my pain to be inflicted on others - I want no one to escape.
I despise spoiled, arrogant people, which is also why I'm so fund of computers; they do what you want them to do and if it generate errors, it's probably because I screwed something up myself.
I despise all those idiotic kids who brag about their amazing skills; real hackers don't brag about being real as long as he knows it himself.
Redemption
Just how sick are you? How many barriers would you cross simply to satisfy your own urge?
I know you don't care about others and feel no emotional bond towards the individuals, who would consider themselves your friends; I know the only reason why you don't steal from the nearest electronics shop is because it would cause to much hassle if you got caught; I know you want to have complete control over the situation, enabling yourself to be the smartest person in the room and always be on top.
If you can't follow my line of thought up until now, you might consider myself and others alike inhuman, but that's also far from the truth; hacking is my tofu when I actually thirst for steak:
We've all got families. We've got friends. Some of us got kids.. Simply letting our urges run wild would be fatal for the lives of those few people we love - because even though we don't care for strangers, we'll sacrifice anything for those we love - and more importantly it would disable us from continuing our hacking spree.
The most important thing in my world is to continue satisfying my urge, meaning that the worst that could possibly happen would be that I somehow got forced to stop; this is the exact reason why it's crucial, that I solely do keep to hacking people and not the far worse things I can only dream about - despite how delicious that blood-dripping steak would be, I would rather eat tofu for the rest of my life than throw it all away for just one steak.
But even after admitting this, there is no catharsis for me; the reason for my urge continues to elude me, and I gain no deeper knowledge of myself..
It's survival.. and in the end, that's what it's all about.
The Consciousness
This section is what this thread is all about.
In order to have success as a hacker, you'll need to cross barriers that normal people wouldn't, and this exact point is something most people don't understand when they want to get into hacking. In hacking, there's no room for sympathy or empathy; it's not personal, so don't treat the activities that way.
By hacking your school and modifying your grades you shit on the system simply to benefit yourself in a way that's unfair to everyone else, but you shouldn't care about that - it's nothing personal.
By wiping a server you destroy what some worker has spent countless hours constructing, in a matter of seconds, but you shouldn't care about that - it's nothing personal.
And then comes the things we can't discuss on here..
How would you feel knowing that you stole everything from some old couple, who can do nothing about it? Would you be able to sleep at night knowing they may lose their house because of your actions?
Before even starting to learn about different topic within hacking, you should figure out what type of person you are and where you have your limits; now write this conscious decision down and keep it for the future - this'll allow you to look back and see where you shouldn't go any further, otherwise you may just be tempted to do something you'll later regret.
Now there's those of you, who would end up regretting actions because of your sympathy for the target, and then there's those of us, who doesn't even have doesn't even have sympathy in our dictionaries..
Not Afraid
If you understand what I mean; if you feel as I feel; if you've been seeking for a solution as I've been seeking, then don't hold back, but share your thoughts and your experiences, because if I've learned anything, it's that there's dozens on people on these forums who're just as psychologically different as myself.
But let me be clear when saying, that I do not consider this a weakness nor an issue; the darkness is a part of me and I embrace it - I've learned to utilize the lack of emotions and take advantage of my situation, and so should you if you haven't already.
Whatever your parents, your teachers, your colleagues or your psychologist says, I tell you now that you're in no way 'sick'.
You are unusual. You are special. You are different.
I am 'different' and I say it proudly.
Are you?
Are you?
We are #, and this is a look into our consciousness.
Business will go on as usual.
Business will go on as usual.
We can only hope that one of you will find this thread interesting and hopefully learn more about yourself from reading it.
We are #; we are legion.
* - Ʀαpĥαǝĺ - May 7, 2014
Nice thread. Dealing with the "evil" dark part of me is often challenging. I will read the entire thread when I get home and am able to listen to the music videos in the background.
* - badvibes - May 7, 2014
really interesting post, must've taken a while to write
spelling mistake: 'why im so FUND of computers'
* - VirusTotal - May 7, 2014
Wow! Another awesome thread for Anonymous!
* - Astral™ - May 7, 2014
Still confused as to whether or not Anon is confirmed dead.
Also, I can actually relate to some of this. I do feel empathy and do try my best to help others at all times.
* - Banish - May 7, 2014
Another big thread. I look forward to reading this through.
EDIT; read it through. Fascinating read.
I personally cannot empathise fully with you. I feel sympathy and pity far too easily. Maybe that's my hamartia.
* - Rayyy - May 7, 2014
Another huge story. I'll read this then edit my post.
* - Builder_Geeza - May 7, 2014
Yet another amazing thread, thank you Anonymous.
Regards;
~Aidan
* - Narrate - May 7, 2014
# | The Confusion - Dead?... or nah.
* - /Jigsaw/ - May 7, 2014
Good read, liked the other one better though.
* - Brule - May 7, 2014
I suppose this isn't important for you, but I'll just leave this message.
Your threads are amazing to read, and I can relate to alot of it.
Hopefully I can walk in your footsteps one day, wheter those footsteps are footsteps of a thousand people, or even just an idea.
Thank you.
* - UkVenoM - May 7, 2014
I completely agree with this, although i don't know you nor any individuals at #, I dare say i relate to this. Hacking shouldn't be deem as a personal attack, It's just business.
About the lack of emotions, I am at a stage in life where i have full control over emotions. Recently i was told a member of my family died, i felt nothing. No pain, no sorrow. Is that sick? i don't believe it is, i can provide you with an illusion that i care. But it's not real. Am i sick? I don't believe so, i can simply control emotions to a certain level higher than those of other individuals. It developed as i went though deep depression but rather than see it as a flaw, i see myself improved. People often question my motives, I have none. Its just business.
Great read as usual, Keep up the insanely HQ post's Sir. 🤝
* - Trisomy 21 - May 7, 2014
Jesus christ why is nobody else using this strategy to advertise their products in the lounge?
* - shrekislifeshrekislove - May 7, 2014
Nice story, it's a bit 2 complicated for me. But still RIP Anonymous, you gotta do what you gotta do to feed your family.
* - Guardian™ - May 7, 2014
It's weird how much I can relate to the story. I often though there was something wrong with me, a sickness or something, but this thread have given me something to think on. I'll continue to cross barriers.
And to answer the question; I am different and I am proud of it!