[SecretAchiever101]

Who am I?
I am V. I am not special. I am just an idiot who did some mistakes in the past and I want to prevent you from going down the same road as me.

What do I want to talk about?
Depression. Suicidal thoughts. Drug addictions. Family issues.

My past.
I come from a poor family. Growing up we had a lot of issues.Specifically economic ones.Growing up in that kind of environment made me think that MONEY is the solution to every problem. So here we go,our story starts. Growing up as a kid I had a loose temper, I disagreed with a random kid,got into an argument,one thing led to another and I broke his jaw. Like literally, broke his fucking jaw. He was about to sue me soon after, but I managed to convince him and his dad not to. I was selling drugs back then and also was using them of course. Coke,LSD, ecstasy MDMA, you name it. I had used each and every drug available to me and also had sold each and every drug that I had access to. I managed to climb the ladder of drug dealers so fast. "DAMN", I thought to myself. I am fucking awesome, I am the MAN.

I started having some underlings that were working for me.One group of people collecting the debts that specific individuals owed to me. One group of people selling the drugs. One group of people that should handle any "emergency" we come up with, if you know what I mean. Soon after,my drug addiction started getting worse and worse. I couldn't sleep at night, I used to cut myself in order to feel alive again when my girl left me and also I got kicked out from my home. Each and every day was heavier than the previous one. I struggled to wake up. I struggled to fucking LIVE. All I wanted was to just lay down and die peacefully. Nobody wanted me, I had become so toxic to everyone, I distanced myself from any close relationship and all I cared for ,was, MONEY and how to obtain them.

---

Fast forward, a couple of months,some problems started to pop up within my clique. They started to become less and less "loyal" to me, forming their own alliances and soon after I had no one besides me. No friends. No family. No girlfriend. No one. Fucking no one. Just me.
I am a waste of time and space, I thought to myself. I destroyed every bond I had with people I cared for. I disrespected and distanced my friends and family and even my girl who she loved me. I should just die,right here and now, right?

WRONG.

You are not a waste of space. You are NOT a waste of time. You are NOT useless. YOU can change your life. YOU have the power to overcome any fucking fears you have. YOU can overcome any insecurities and ANY difficult situations that you put yourself into. THERE IS ALWAYS time available to make up for your MISTAKES. Do NOT lose hope. Every day is a new opportunity to grow yourself into a better person. You. Yes, YOU have the power to destroy yourself, or fix it. It's all up to you and only, what YOU decide to do with yourself. YOU are accountable of your own actions and YOU have to fix everything that you broke.
....And so I did...

I stopped doing this kind of business. I went to see my mother and apologize to her for causing her such a problem. What a fucking idiot I was. My dad too. He was pretending to be harsh and strict all this time, but I knew.. I knew that this bastard loved me. He loved me a ton and he was just trying with his approach to prevent me from doing all these things.I got back with my old friends again. I am so lucky that they understood my situation and forgive me. If I were them I wouldn't have give me a second chance.

I stopped using drugs for good. I only drink some alcohol from time to time. Drugs,especially heavy ones like these, have the power to distort your reality. When your reality is distorted you are not reliable as a human being. At least,that's my opinion on the subject.
I will NEVER get myself into this kind of community. NEVER, ever again. I am clean now. I am clean of suicidal thoughts. I am clean of depression. I am a normal human being as we all are. I did some major mistakes,yeah indeed. I am idiot for doing so, I recognize that. However, I also do recognize the fact that it's NEVER late. Is it ever late for you to change yourself and your ambitions?

NO.

Do you have family issues?            Do you have depression?         Are you associated with any kinds of drug use?      



Do you have suicidal thoughts?          Do you feel lonely?                         Do you want to change your life for the better?


I advise you to keep going. Keep it UP. NEVER, it's too late. And if you feel like you cannot take it anymore, trust me, keep going. This burden is soon going to fade away. Start being productive, work out, set goals and try to reach em. With productivity comes a relief soon after. Whenever we don't produce something that we feel is right for ourselves, we feel incompetent. Incompetent to keep on going. Incompetent to LIVE. I know it's hard. I know it is not easy. I know, it feels like hell. Trust me, I know. However your responsibility is to clench your teeth every fucking single morning, squeeze your fucking buttocks and say NO, I am not gonna let this feeling take over me. I AM BETTER THAN THAT.

I AM ME.

Thank you for reading this. I hope that I managed to affect a single person in a good way. Even if I get a negative backlash regarding this thread, if ONE single person reading this managed to feel less lonely, I am happy with it.


~V

[Mr. Robot]

I appreciate it. I was pretty damn close to giving up on my game because of being around 500 short for something important to launch my campaign.

Gave me some hope to chill for a couple days and step away for a minute.

Thanks V.

[dredos]

I'm glad you managed to get out of the problems and especially the hell of drugs. Guys make sure you read this and think a little bit about what you want to do with your life. There's hope for everyone and it's never too late.

Beautiful thread!

[SecretAchiever101]

I appreciate it. I was pretty damn close to giving up on my game because of being around 500 short for something important to launch my campaign.

Gave me some hope to chill for a couple days and step away for a minute.

Thanks V.

If you trolling me,just so you know, you do it in a beautiful way.

I'm glad you managed to get out of the problems and especially the hell of drugs. Guys make sure you read this and think a little bit about what you want to do with your life. There's hope for everyone and it's never too late.

Beautiful thread!

Thanks bud! I really hope my shity thread motivates at least one person !

[A +]

Posting here to read this thread again. That was a good story man, and congrats. You're a smart dude. I was pretty much in the same boat, I was in deep. I have been clean from hard drugs and got out of that scene 11 years ago. I moved to a new state, and sometimes I miss home. But when I think about it, that's not my home anymore. It changed and so did the people. Now it's more of a ghetto.

Regardless, trying to stop smoking cigarettes (Those ass holes pack a punch. Stop while you can and don't start if you do), and drink less. Not too many friends around here, and I've managed to make an ass out of myself a few times, but one foot in front of the other baby. I had some alcohol doing the talking for me in front of my friends the other night. I start sweating just thinking about it. I was like I'm so sorry, I'm really not a jackass :(. They get it though.

[SecretAchiever101]

Posting here to read this thread again.  That was a good story man, and congrats. You're a smart dude. I was pretty much in the same boat, I was in deep. I have been clean from hard drugs and got out of that scene 11 years ago.  I moved to a new state, and sometimes I miss home. But when I think about it, that's not my home anymore. It changed and so did the people. Now it's more of a ghetto.

Regardless, trying to stop smoking cigarettes (Those ass holes pack a punch.  Stop while you can and don't start if you do), and drink less. Not too many friends around here, and I've managed to make an ass out of myself a few times, but one foot in front of the other baby. I had some alcohol doing the talking for me in front of my friends the other night. I start sweating just thinking about it. I was like I'm so sorry, I'm really not a jackass :(. They get it though.

Even managed to quit smoking brother. I am glad you managed to get out of the shithole yourself too. Every day is a struggle....And a journey..Not necessarily a bad one tho

[The AI]

Good story mate! Very inspirational. Once I had myself in a similar situation, sucking into world of drugs and crime. Luckily, managed to get out of that environment.
I'm glad you could get out of this shit as well.

[swolley]

Interesting read. Interesting thoughts. It sounds like you're speaking a lot to yourself here. Hope you do well in the future, OP.

[SecretAchiever101]

Good story mate! Very inspirational. Once I had myself in a similar situation, sucking into world of drugs and crime. Luckily, managed to get out of that environment.
I'm glad you could get out of this shit as well.

Get out and never going back baby.

Interesting read. Interesting thoughts. It sounds like you're speaking a lot to yourself here. Hope you do well in the future, OP.

I am good now...Starting my own business,quit every drug and even quit smoking. Everything change for the better when you have the patience to wait it out.That's my opinion..

[duplex]

You're a beautiful person secret, I'll be defo pming you about this.

[SecretAchiever101]

You're a beautiful person secret, I'll be defo pming you about this.

Thank you very much,you are more than welcome to pm me whenever.
For sure not a beautiful person tho. Just an idiot who happened to be lucky and get out of this shithole.

[duplex]

Thank you very much,you are more than welcome to pm me whenever.
For sure not a beautiful person tho. Just an idiot who happened to be lucky and get out of this shithole.

Lol, I come from London, been stabbed once, nearly murdered three times, Dad got me hooked on Cocaine to leverage me against my mum. I've been shot at, pretty much had to survive on the streets growing up. Dad was a big gang member who sold drugs and has admitted to killing people.

but I'm still standing "elton john"

Edit: Doctor told me I have PTSD, so that's not cool. But I don't take much notice, I'm quite strong mentally I think. Although things have been getting to me lately, my friends etc.

[SecretAchiever101]

Lol, I come from London, been stabbed once, nearly murdered three times, Dad got me hooked on Cocaine to leverage me against my mum. I've been shot at, pretty much had to survive on the streets growing up. Dad was a big gang member who sold drugs and has admitted to killing people.

but I'm still standing "elton john"

The murder attempts to you were due to your dad, or something of your own doing?

[duplex]

The murder attempts to you were due to your dad, or something of your own doing?

I'm a completely normal guy who plays video games, never sold drugs or done anything wrong. This wasn't my Dad, these murder attempts were random, luckily I'm quick on my feet and I've also had to jump from a building to avoid being killed, it sounds fucked I know but it's kinda normal around here, I've moved away from that now though, in a safer place

[SecretAchiever101]

I'm a completely normal guy who plays video games, never sold drugs or done anything wrong. This wasn't my Dad, these murder attempts were random, luckily I'm quick on my feet and I've also had to jump from a building to avoid being killed, it sounds fucked I know but it's kinda normal around here, I've moved away from that now though, in a safer place

Sounds fucked up man... I mean..me? Well, I had it coming, it was a matter of time, I did a lot of bad and unethical things so it's only natural that karma will get back at me.
However,if you just a normal dude and not willing to hurt anybody ,having these type of situations happen to you, that's fucked up