Just want to see the HF opinion on this. Not meant to be soft or a gender study. For me it’s really not that “be a man” is toxic, it’s just that I find there are better ways to communicate than to say this, especially in situations in which you might be talking down to someone like maybe in a workplace or trying to teach your son a lesson.
Does anyone have any thoughts on this? I saw some post on Facebook awhile ago and that had very… “mom” answers. I wanna see what people really think on this. I found it thought provoking but I don’t think it was narrowed down like this
(May 5, 2023 01:28 PM)Aqzxk Wrote: Just want to see the HF opinion on this. Not meant to be soft or a gender study. For me it’s really not that “be a man” is toxic, it’s just that I find there are better ways to communicate than to say this, especially in situations in which you might be talking down to someone like maybe in a workplace or trying to teach your son a lesson.
Does anyone have any thoughts on this? I saw some post on Facebook awhile ago and that had very… “mom” answers. I wanna see what people really think on this. I found it thought provoking but I don’t think it was narrowed down like this
There must be a perfect balance between the meanings of these idioms. Being a man in the sense of having the courage to face a situation, asserting oneself with value on one's arguments and enforcing one's values is legitimate but not necessarily this must be attributed to being a man. On the other hand, when we talk about the idealization of man as a gender and the forcing of this "condition" on a person of the male gender is discriminatory not only against the way of being of a person but also against the values he may have and the mindset it has. In my opinion, idealizing a man or a woman is a totally wrong concept, in fact many times it has been seen that when the two are "changed roles" they can obtain the same results (and let's forget about the activities involving physical stress and muscle strength (which seems obvious to me that there is a natural disadvantage). I believe that this method of idealizing man is not only ancient and obsolete from every point of view but also useless and harmful, with this I don't mean that a person should atrophy and shut himself up for his fears by not enforcing even the minimum of his own virility but not that the opposite becomes an obsession and a natural duty.
(May 5, 2023 02:56 PM)SIM-3221368 Wrote: I think the fact that this discussion is needed is sad and really shows you what state the world is in right now...
You are HIGHLY missing the point. It takes an open mind to take part in this discussion. I’d appreciate if you didnt, I don’t think you have what it takes
(May 5, 2023 02:11 PM)Vipеr Wrote: It really depends on the situation so there's no direct answer.
Be a man and ask her out? Not toxic.
Be a man and stop crying that you got sexually assaulted? Toxic.
This. There is a trend recently to use therapy-speak to shut people down. Notice how those that blame others of being toxic are not known for their good deeds?
(May 5, 2023 02:56 PM)SIM-3221368 Wrote: I think the fact that this discussion is needed is sad and really shows you what state the world is in right now...
Times are changing, people used to use these words a lot back then but also people didn't mean it to descibe others most of the time.
Today, I can understand how this is offensive to someone, and it also depends on situation in which this is being used and also the way someone says it, obviously if they mean to degrade someone based on how they live, this could be traumatic to someone, but since its the people not the words themselves, I think we need to take an underanding on how we use it and when.
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