[Roberto Scorpius Malfoy]

I am going to write off myself a little bit because I would like to hear your opinion guys.

So, first of all, I am not good on answering phonecalls because I don't like speaking on phone, so when most of my friends are calling me I don't pick up and I text them saying "what's up" or sometimes I call them up, most of my cousins doesn't appreciate that I am not good at answering phone calls and yesterday one of my cousins I hang out with frequently confronted me.

He said that what's wrong with you when you go out you don't call me, when I want to go on vacation you don't want to follow with me and suddenly 2 weeks later you go on your own vacation with other ppl?

First of all his vacation cost 1100 EUR, and the vacation I am going to is to Amsterdam just to chill and relax, what my cousin doesn't understand is that he thinks that the world just circulates all around him, one day he called me and said hey I am on my way to your house I bought some chickens for me and you lets come to your house and eat it (I was home alone) I said no and he got mad shouting wtf is this I am thinking about you buying chicken for you and you tell me I can't come to your house etc etc..


Another day He called me I picked up he said what's up, I said I am out with Jake, and he said okay then and hang up.

So  he confronted me yesterday saying that "if you don't start to answer on your phone I will stop calling you and totally dont care about you, start to behave and answer on your phone when I call" and I said hey you are the only one having problem with this and confronts me, and he said"Hell no I have ppl calling me sometimes and saying why isn't Roberto answering on his phone, everyone gets mad because of that" And I said well then you have your answer, this is nothing personal against you I just don't like speaking on phone and you call me most of the times when I am at work (I work from home, because of that they think I can answer whenever I want)

So this cousin is this kind of a guy that makes 20-30 phone calls a day to 5-6 different persons, this guy takes anabolic and he can be super aggressive sometimes.

One day I bought a Moncler jacket for 800 EUR, I got a lot of jackets that is worth 500-600 EUR, he asked if he could borrow my jacket because he is going on a date, I said, of course, you can do it, he borrowed it and never gave it back, one day we were outside and a guy was "hey dude you are dripped" he said yeah bro it was about time to start getting nice clothes, suddenly when that guy left and we sat on the car alone I said "Just so you know you can keep borrowing my jacket but at some point, I will need it back" He was "hey what you are doing is totally wrong, this is my jacket now man you have already plenty of jackets that have high value, he started to argue and stuff like that and suddenly said okay I will give it to you when I am tired of it/in a few months.

So after 1-2 months or something, we were building a fire in the forest and he came to visit us all boys and he came with my jacket, so he was close to the fire while having my jacket on and I don't know how to explain in English but the fire sends out small things that can fuck up the jacket (I don't know what the name is of these small fire things that flyes out from the fire) So he was there and my jacket was on him and I didn't tell him anything but I was really annoyed.

The day after we were going to do the same thing and we were preparing everything buying stuff etc.. I called him and said hey today when we are going there, can you go with another jacket because the jacket will stink as hell from the fire and it can get fucked up from the fire because we are sitting close to a huge fire, he said WTF man come and get your fucking jacket you are behaving like its made of gold, go and get me another jacket of yours at least, I said no I don't have one available at the moment, he shouted I don't want to have anything to do with you take your damn jacket etc..

Then when we went there and saw each other he just gave me the jacket nicely..

So there's soo many things I can say about him, he has also done nice things, but when he does nice things he always brings it up, like let's say today he drives you to the airport, the next day he wants something from you and maybe you cant help him he will say "Oh but when I drive you to the airport its totally okay" So actually I have stopped requesting favors from him because of that but yeah the main reason for this thread is do you guys think I can still hang out with him and at the same time develop as a person and make my business and future to become good?

Worth mentioning he likes to decide things, like what we are going to do for the day and shit like that that annoys me also because I always tell him it's not all about what you want to do every time when we go out and chill he can get mad if you don't drink alcohol he can say like why did you come if you are not going to drink? One day he came to Amsterdam without taking a single smoke from a joint, that's basically the same thing.

Also one day I was outside he called me he was having a hangover, he told me can you please buy food for me, I went to McDonald's with my car bought some food for him went to his house, apparently, something on the order was wrong and he shouted at me in front of my friend outside his house when I gave him the food because the order was wrong, and then ended up not eating the order.

We are childhood friends of 10 ppl, and actually, around 50-60% doesn't like his behavior and thinks he is annoying sometimes but we just don't care, but sometimes at some point, it can be really annoying.

You know what most irritates me of all this is his age and how he still can behave like this at the age he is, we can go to a computer place where people play all kinds of computer games its like 200 different games on the computers there, he can just start throwing cokes on ppl (friends) just start a war there so everyone starts throwing things and then ends up the game we play gets interrupted (5v5 csgo, he closes someones computer and then its 5v4 and everyone lose their desire to play) I then decide to play a different game FIFA21 and he comes to my place of the computer center and tells me "Did I come here and pay 17 Bucks to just sitting here and don't play? (Obviously when I and my other mate started to play FIFA they could not play 5v5 anymore and he was a little bit disappointed.

Or another day when we went out to the forest and had a barbeque it was a lovely place some guy built up in the forest in his free time, my cousin at the end of our barbeque started to throw gas everywhere and wanted to set the whole place on fire, a place we used to chill in many many times not sure why he would do that he just wanted to do that and everyone just went up and walked away (that's probably what he wanted when he wants to go it ends up that everyone goes because he is like "let's go cmon" and just repeat that.

And also when you go out with him and eat food, he doesn't like that you eat everything, we went out one day and skiing and I was about to eat my last slice of the pizza he took it from my plate and said I told you to stop eating everything on your plate every time we go out it doesn't look good they will think that you are some kind of a hunger kid.


EDIT:  He is born between 90-92

[bk randy]

Dude sounds like a dipwit, I'd take your stuff and do what you want. As for not letting him come over to eat chicken with you, I mean, I believe to always welcome family into my home whenever, if someone thought of me enough to bring me food over I would be very happy, and that does happen sometime.

As for the jacket, I just wouldn't lend him stuff anymore, use the jacket as an example as to why you won't and leave it at that.

[Sky]

Sorry, I don't mean to sound like an asshole, but your cousin sounds like a dickhead. You owe him nothing, don't let him take advantage of you, cut em off. I did the same to my cousin, way better off. Not ALL family has your best intentions in mind. Some only think about themselves.

[False King]

Sorry, I don't mean to sound like an asshole, but your cousin sounds like a dickhead.  You owe him nothing, don't let him take advantage of you, cut em off.  I did the same to my cousin, way better off.  Not ALL family has your best intentions in mind.  Some only think about themselves.

Right in point with this one. I've cut off much closer family relatives and my quality of life improved quite a bit. Toxic people shouldn't be in your life.

If anything, just ignore all his shit. Let him know you'll talk again if he stops acting like some weirdass wannabe alpha and shows some empathy for you.

Friendship is a two way street.

[Roberto Scorpius Malfoy]

I got thru about 3/4 of this thread, I don’t like to speak on phones much either but we are grown and sometimes have to answer. That being said it doesn’t mean you need to jump Everytime your bum cousin calls. Honestly, sounds super weird. He just sounds like he’s jealous for whatever reason or doesn’t have any other friends so he relies on you to be there for him. Just because you don’t want to hang out all the time or answer the phone all the time doesn’t make you a bad person or in the wrong. As for the vacation that was brought up? fugg em, you wanted to go out with your mates and it was reasonably priced, why not? Don’t jump for this man just because he wants you to be on his time or the way he wants things.

It's not like that I ignore phonecalls all the time, the reason I ignore most phones from cousins is that most of them only call me when they need help with their PCs or want me to build a website for them, and out of that I have made 0 bucks, no one offers me a single penny, so when I don't answer phonecalls most of my cousins are calling him to ask hey why isn't Roberto answering and that is what he brought up "Start answering on your phone, etc.."

And when it comes to friends most of them calls me during the time I work and I don't like to answer phonecalls when I am at home or working because a lot of ppl can hear me speak then which I find uncomfortable.

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Dude sounds like a dipwit, I'd take your stuff and do what you want. As for not letting him come over to eat chicken with you, I mean, I believe to always welcome family into my home whenever, if someone thought of me enough to bring me food over I would be very happy, and that does happen sometime.

As for the jacket, I just wouldn't lend him stuff anymore, use the jacket as an example as to why you want and leave it at that.

The reason I did not want him to come over and eat chicken with me is.

1, You don't call someone and tell him "Hey I am on my way to your house with Simon, we bought some chicken for us and you let eat it at your house"
At least call me beforehand and ask if it's okay, you don't just call and tell someone "we are on our way"

2, I already had friends over we were smoking a blunt and watching on TV, these friends are the same friends that my cousins hang out with sometimes and at that time he did not like them so it would be a bit weird if he came and they were there, and if I told him that you cant come over I have already friends here he would go super mad saying "you choose those fucking friendly people over your cousin right?"

3, This guy never cleans, if he comes to your house and eats things, he will never clean after himself, he will use "I bought the chicken for you" as an excuse to not clean, I mean everything he does for you is something he will use against you, let's say if you are in a fight and he helped you, next day he needs something and you refuse to help him with it he will say "Oh but when I help you in fights it's totally okay but when I ask for that you cant do it.

The dude literally called me 3 days ago at night asked me if I could drive to the gas station to buy him a lighter because he was drunk and a girl was coming over to him, I told him no do it yourself.


Also one day I was outside he called me he was having a hangover, he told me can you please buy food for me, I went to McDonald's with my car bought some food for him went to his house, apparently, something on the order was wrong and he shouted at me in front of my friend outside his house when I gave him the food because the order was wrong, and then ended up not eating the order.

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Sorry, I don't mean to sound like an asshole, but your cousin sounds like a dickhead.  You owe him nothing, don't let him take advantage of you, cut em off.  I did the same to my cousin, way better off.  Not ALL family has your best intentions in mind.  Some only think about themselves.

The issue here to cut him off is that we have some friends, lets say if I hang out with some of my friends he will automatically also be there if he is free from work, so it would be that we don't speak but still hang out with each other.