[DenizZ]

Hi,

I have been in a depressive mood for awhile now. And even if no one is gonna read this it feels good to write about it.

About 2 years ago I started an employment agency in The Netherlands, basically I am the bridge between employee and employer. Once the employee works I start getting a commision from the employer per hour the employee works until he stops. I have around 600 people now working via me. It's seasonal work, in the low season (winter) it drops to around 300 people. This made me earn quite a lot of money for my age (26). About €14.000 to €16.000 weekly. All my friends say you've got nothing to complain about bla bla but hey I learned that money only gives temporary happiness. I bought a car, made me happy and after 2 months the hapinness is gone, I go to vacation, made me happy and after 2 weeks it's gone.

So everything went financially well, but yet I don't feel happy. Not happy at all. I fell in love with very good girlfriend of mine, someone I see and hang out daily with for many hours, I'd say 4-5 hours per day for 10 years! The feelings started coming 2 years ago. He broke up with his boyfriend about a year and half ago and i thought this is my chance. But here is another problem, she is the daughter of my uncle from mothers side. In my family weddings between family happened before (not first grade family ofc). And she is now speaking with someone after a 1-2 others didn't go well. But now she is becoming serious with someone and it's killing me.

I've gone so crazy that I constantly check whether she is online on WhatsApp or Instagram, sometimes when I drop her home I drive around checking whether she went home or not. These are things I normally absolutely wouldn't do. When she is texting the guy right next to me it's making me crazy.

I tried to forget but I constantly hang with her which makes it really hard, she is my bestfriend for 10 years. I thought maybe distancing myself but that didn't work out either. I don't have any other close friends, basically without her I am a lonely. I'm quite dependend on her when it comes to my social life and so is she (for now). It isn't official between the guy and her but it can be anytime.

Other than this my life is okay, good family, supporting parents and siblings, but I can't tell them this because she is family too and I don't think my family nor her would want a family wedding.

Uhh I'm getting mad. What would you advice me?

[Truth]

Money might not buy happiness, but being broke can't buy anything. Make sure you still growing that mula man. Euro is less than dollar now, you'll need more.

With that being said, my advice is for you to think of your perfect day, then just live it fully, even if you can only do it for a day, it will give you a glimpse of what is possible.

[Pathy32]

So she’s your mom’s brother’s daughter? That in my culture is extremely taboo and isn’t something that should be done. You must be from a different background than me if that’s something that would be considered okay to you. Which it is okay if your culture is okay with that it’s just not something that’s okay to me. I would suggest you branch out and meet more women that would broaden your horizon and show you more of the world and what it has to offer. All that aside money can only buy you so much happiness. I’ve ridden the highs and the lows of money but I’ll tell you one thing and I’d rather be sad with money than to be sad and broke lol

[Pikachu]

So im not very good with relationships so i cant give advice on that. However, happiness is something you gotta find within yourself. I suggest maybe try out some different forms of meditation, maybe try yoga. Take deep breaths, relax. Life can be shit, full of obstacles. We gotta overcome that shit, get past those obstacles. It's never easy but it is possible. Another suggestion i have is maybe try looking into psilocybin therapy perhaps.

[DenizZ]

Money might not buy happiness, but being broke can't buy anything. Make sure you still growing that mula man. Euro is less than dollar now, you'll need more.

With that being said, my advice is for you to think of your perfect day, then just live it fully, even if you can only do it for a day, it will give you a glimpse of what is possible.

Yes along with the inflation it's losing value every day, but can't find something to invest in and I'm not into cryptos.
Thanks just talking to someone helps already :)

So she’s your mom’s brother’s daughter? That in my culture is extremely taboo and isn’t something that should be done. You must be from a different background than me if that’s something that would be considered okay to you. Which it is okay if your culture is okay with that it’s just not something that’s okay to me. I would suggest you branch out and meet more women that would broaden your horizon and show you more of the world and what it has to offer. All that aside money can only buy you so much happiness. I’ve ridden the highs and the lows of money but I’ll tell you one thing and I’d rather be sad with money than to be sad and broke lol

Yes exactly, but I have a middle-eastern/caucausian background and it's normal in our culture. Doesn't happen often anymore, my parents wouldn't prefer it.

No matter what women I talk to, I never get the feelings. Tried that but then I even get the feeling that I am betraying her, which makes no sense.

You're right, being broke and sad is worse than wealthy and sad, but trust me I can't say that I am super-rich but I consider myself quite above average and it doesn't give happiness. I believe happiness can only be found in love and friendship.

So im not very good with relationships so i cant give advice on that. However, happiness is something you gotta find within yourself. I suggest maybe try out some different forms of meditation, maybe try yoga. Take deep breaths, relax. Life can be shit, full of obstacles. We gotta overcome that shit, get past those obstacles. It's never easy but it is possible. Another suggestion i have is maybe try looking into psilocybin therapy perhaps.

I am considering therapy, just have someone to talk these things about. Even writing here is helping a bit.

[Pikachu]

Yes along with the inflation it's losing value every day, but can't find something to invest in and I'm not into cryptos.
Thanks just talking to someone helps already :)


Yes exactly, but I have a middle-eastern/caucausian background and it's normal in our culture. Doesn't happen often anymore, my parents wouldn't prefer it.

No matter what women I talk to, I never get the feelings. Tried that but then I even get the feeling that I am betraying her, which makes no sense.

You're right, being broke and sad is worse than wealthy and sad, but trust me I can't say that I am super-rich but I consider myself quite above average and it doesn't give happiness. I believe happiness can only be found in love and friendship.


I am considering therapy, just have someone to talk these things about. Even writing here is helping a bit.

Psilocybin therapy is different than regular therapy, it involves using psilocybin mushrooms (shrooms) therapeutically in micro doses. Theres been lots of studies and research on the benefits and uses of magic mushrooms for depression as well as other mental health related problems. Check out this research article on it by the John Hopkins medical research team

[Bob White]

Many other people out there. Move on and find other joy in life. With money and health many people will find you attractive and love you. Don't limit yourself to one person. Get out and live life.

[NARVI]

Hi,

I have been in a depressive mood for awhile now. And even if no one is gonna read this it feels good to write about it.

About 2 years ago I started an employment agency in The Netherlands, basically I am the bridge between employee and employer. Once the employee works I start getting a commision from the employer per hour the employee works until he stops. I have around 600 people now working via me. It's seasonal work, in the low season (winter) it drops to around 300 people. This made me earn quite a lot of money for my age (26). About €14.000 to €16.000 weekly. All my friends say you've got nothing to complain about bla bla but hey I learned that money only gives temporary happiness. I bought a car, made me happy and after 2 months the hapinness is gone, I go to vacation, made me happy and after 2 weeks it's gone.

So everything went financially well, but yet I don't feel happy. Not happy at all. I fell in love with very good girlfriend of mine, someone I see and hang out daily with for many hours, I'd say 4-5 hours per day for 10 years! The feelings started coming 2 years ago. He broke up with his boyfriend about a year and half ago and i thought this is my chance. But here is another problem, she is the daughter of my uncle from mothers side. In my family weddings between family happened before (not first grade family ofc). And she is now speaking with someone after a 1-2 others didn't go well. But now she is becoming serious with someone and it's killing me.

I've gone so crazy that I constantly check whether she is online on WhatsApp or Instagram, sometimes when I drop her home I drive around checking whether she went home or not. These are things I normally absolutely wouldn't do. When she is texting the guy right next to me it's making me crazy.

I tried to forget but I constantly hang with her which makes it really hard, she is my bestfriend for 10 years. I thought maybe distancing myself but that didn't work out either. I don't have any other close friends, basically without her I am a lonely. I'm quite dependend on her when it comes to my social life and so is she (for now). It isn't official between the guy and her but it can be anytime.

Other than this my life is okay, good family, supporting parents and siblings, but I can't tell them this because she is family too and I don't think my family nor her would want a family wedding.

Uhh I'm getting mad. What would you advice me?

Believe me, speaking based on experience- it will all pass.

[Bluffer]

Find new challenges, set new goals and accomplish them. Find new reasons to enjoy life.

New relationships/friends, new hobbies, etc.


Also the incest stuff is weird, find someone that isn't family .

[Livewire]

The grass is not always greener on the other side, friend.

[DenizZ]

Many other people out there. Move on and find other joy in life. With money and health many people will find you attractive and love you. Don't limit yourself to one person. Get out and live life.

If only it was that easy :/

Just tell her how you feel. When she comes ask her if she can touch your wee..wee.. and tell her how you feel about her.
Make sure family isn't around and do it not when she's gets to your place. Just after an hour watching a movie bring it up.
It's best to see how she feels about it and if she doesn't like it then be like ok that's cool. Then you got your answer and let it be.
You never know maybe she has feelings for you but think that same thing. That is why she's dating around.

I considered that but I am afraid of losing the friendship afterwards.

Believe me, speaking based on experience- it will all pass.

I hope soon it will pass

Find new challenges, set new goals and accomplish them. Find new reasons to enjoy life.

New relationships/friends, new hobbies, etc.


Also the incest stuff is weird, find someone that isn't family .

The financial part of my goals are going well, I like travelling but then I got no friends that can afford to go to exotic trips. I always have goals but the relationship stuff is fucking my mind.

The family thing is obviously very weird to hear for you, but in my culture this is normal and doesn't sound weird to the ears. It's complicated :P

Do you remember in our adolescence or earlier years when we though all we needed was expensive clothes, expensive tech, nice car, diamonds, jewelry etc. and the older generation told us--in what we thought were attempts at humbling us--told us that money doesn't buy happiness? It turns out; it is very true.

Once you set those seemingly endless goals for yourself, and achieve them you often find yourself at a loss for "what's next" if you've achieved your goals. Perishable or material goals are not what build happiness, but this is subjective to everyone.

IMO and my experience, 3 goals build happiness;

Equity.
Relationships.
Creativity.


As far as the fucking your cousin goes, you need to get laid repetitively. Use her as a bridge to get to her friends, and her friends' friends. Stick your dick in whatever you can and stop with the family stuff.

I couldn't agree more, at some point money stops giving the joy. Exactly, I am at the ''what's next'' point and this is love and marriage for me. After that I assume I will be very happy, if of course, it is the right person.

The grass is not always greener on the other side, friend.

Yeah :(

[NARVI]

If you need someone to talk to pm me and we can set up some conversation or chat or something.

[Gary]

Also the incest stuff is weird, find someone that isn't family .

As far as the fucking your cousin goes, you need to get laid repetitively. Use her as a bridge to get to her friends, and her friends' friends. Stick your dick in whatever you can and stop with the family stuff.

Agreed, there's tons of pussy out there. Stop being weird with your cousin.

[Blockonome]

Money brings no happiness, it brings security.

Do what really peaks your happiness and if you do not know what that is, then you better get out there and try different things until somethings makes you truly happy. No drugs or stuff like that, but stuff that actually gives you long term happiness and something you can develop on.

[Bk randy and blunt got u]

Theres always that one that got away. stay strong cuh